For 10 years, triathlete Henri Schoeman has received nasty, horrendous comments for winning a race. Words that you never want to receive. Words that I was surprised anyone would so freely cast at a stranger.
Here’s what happened: Schoeman and the race leader, Jonny Brownlee, were racing each other hard. Near the finishing line, Jonny collapsed from heat exhaustion. Schoeman went on to win the race. All was well, except what happened next.
In third place was Alistair Brownlee, Jonny’s elder brother. Out of brotherly love, Alistair supported his brother to the finishing line. This scene has gone viral countless times in the past decade. And each time, there was a flood of hateful comments thrown at Schoeman (and his family) for ignoring Jonny and finishing the race.
The Brownlee Brothers have been my favorite triathletes since I became a triathlete about 16 years ago. But I believe Schoeman did the right thing. They are professional racers whose careers and lives depend on them winning races. But perhaps more critically, the Brownlee Brothers love racing hard more than anything else. No true athlete wishes their competitors were weak so that they could win races. So, I’m sure the Brownlee Brothers appreciated the hard race and tough competition.
No one should receive the unjustified hate that Schoeman has been getting. As Confucius said, 己所不欲，勿施于人. Or simply, do not do to others what you would not want them to do to you. I don’t think anyone would want to be on the receiving end of those comments. For the sender, it might be a few impulse words, forgotten by the end of the day. But for the receiver, it becomes years of hurt and self-doubt.
I have received some unkind comments from strangers before, and they have affected me for longer than I would like. It might be inevitable since I chose to have a public profile. But it doesn’t have to be like this.
We would never want to be in Schoeman’s position, so let’s not put anyone else in that position. Our words have power. We can tear others down or lift them up. Why not do the right thing?
Keep this letter in your book, and it will come back to you.